After two nights of NyQuil and two boxes of tissues later I am finally feeling better!
I woke this morning with a mild sore throat but the ear ache, stuffy nose, no voice, super sore throat, and chest pain was all gone.
During my absence from my blog me and the kids did some valentines art work. I have not bought the frames for the pictures yet so I have not posted the project. They really enjoyed it creating them. I will get it posted soon.
Athena was with bio mom for the weekend so today has been rough. For the first time Athena yelled at me. Luckily all the kids are sleeping (I am watching Little Isaiah today too) and I am sneaking a mom moment to blog :)
I want to start with the good news. We made it to church on Sunday and it was a huge success! I have been working on getting the family together Sunday mornings and researching churches online to find the church right for us. We have never been huge church goes but I have been involved in a Bible Study group for about 6 months now and feel it is time for me to spend more time worshiping God. What better place to do that then church?
Both kids LOVED it. They had such a good time in their classes. Spencer said "church fun mamma "
I also got a good message from the service. We will be continuing to go to church and I am excited to see God work his way into our home.
During bible study and church this week I was reminded of how important it is to love. More then just loving your family but loving your enemies. I was tested last week in loving my enemies and I believe I failed.
We were scheduled to have Athena home Thursday and when we texted to arrange a pick up time the bio mom informed us it would be 'best' for Athena to stay with her until Sunday because she has been so lenient with her time. She went on to say that my son was a troll and I am nothing close to a mother in her 'honest opinion.'
I was angry, really angry. I wanted to text back my opinions of her and how wrong she was in calling me those names and just being a mamma bear in regards to her name calling my son. I was also mad because Jerry, who dealt with the issue correctly, was not aggressive and lead things to a calm situation. I wanted him to stand up for me and say mean things back to the bio because I was hurt. I was not hurt only for myself but for Athena. I know it all started because the bio heard Athena call me mom and I was worried about how she took it out on Athena. I was also upset that she talked badly about Spencer with her 4 year old. That is not going to teach Athena anything good. (she mentioned what Athena had to say about Spencer too in some of the texts.)
I do not want Athena to feel guilty loving two families. She should not have to choose, she should be able to love both families in a way that makes her comfortable.
I cried and accused him of placing his loyalties in the wrong place and he gently reminded me of who we were dealing with and loving my enemies. He held me as I vented and said mean things about the bio.
This is where I failed.
Those words and feelings should not have left my mouth. She could not hear me, nor did I text a reply, but I can not take those words back. What leaves the mouth comes from the heart, in this case it was not love coming from my heart.
Also blinded by my fury I placed my anger wrongly. I had no reason to be mad at the person who was doing the right thing.
In church we read from 2 Timothy chapter 2 and Peter warns Timothy about arguing. It was another reminder of how I should conduct myself even when upset.
I do have to admit when the bio mom was at my door it took a lot of strength to be kind to her.
I am continuing to pray for God's help in this area I do not believe this will be the last time I am tested in regards to 'loving' the bio mom.
Later tonight I am hoping to find time to post about our day in preschool.
I woke this morning with a mild sore throat but the ear ache, stuffy nose, no voice, super sore throat, and chest pain was all gone.
During my absence from my blog me and the kids did some valentines art work. I have not bought the frames for the pictures yet so I have not posted the project. They really enjoyed it creating them. I will get it posted soon.
Athena was with bio mom for the weekend so today has been rough. For the first time Athena yelled at me. Luckily all the kids are sleeping (I am watching Little Isaiah today too) and I am sneaking a mom moment to blog :)
I want to start with the good news. We made it to church on Sunday and it was a huge success! I have been working on getting the family together Sunday mornings and researching churches online to find the church right for us. We have never been huge church goes but I have been involved in a Bible Study group for about 6 months now and feel it is time for me to spend more time worshiping God. What better place to do that then church?
Both kids LOVED it. They had such a good time in their classes. Spencer said "church fun mamma "
I also got a good message from the service. We will be continuing to go to church and I am excited to see God work his way into our home.
During bible study and church this week I was reminded of how important it is to love. More then just loving your family but loving your enemies. I was tested last week in loving my enemies and I believe I failed.
We were scheduled to have Athena home Thursday and when we texted to arrange a pick up time the bio mom informed us it would be 'best' for Athena to stay with her until Sunday because she has been so lenient with her time. She went on to say that my son was a troll and I am nothing close to a mother in her 'honest opinion.'
I was angry, really angry. I wanted to text back my opinions of her and how wrong she was in calling me those names and just being a mamma bear in regards to her name calling my son. I was also mad because Jerry, who dealt with the issue correctly, was not aggressive and lead things to a calm situation. I wanted him to stand up for me and say mean things back to the bio because I was hurt. I was not hurt only for myself but for Athena. I know it all started because the bio heard Athena call me mom and I was worried about how she took it out on Athena. I was also upset that she talked badly about Spencer with her 4 year old. That is not going to teach Athena anything good. (she mentioned what Athena had to say about Spencer too in some of the texts.)
I do not want Athena to feel guilty loving two families. She should not have to choose, she should be able to love both families in a way that makes her comfortable.
I cried and accused him of placing his loyalties in the wrong place and he gently reminded me of who we were dealing with and loving my enemies. He held me as I vented and said mean things about the bio.
This is where I failed.
Those words and feelings should not have left my mouth. She could not hear me, nor did I text a reply, but I can not take those words back. What leaves the mouth comes from the heart, in this case it was not love coming from my heart.
Also blinded by my fury I placed my anger wrongly. I had no reason to be mad at the person who was doing the right thing.
In church we read from 2 Timothy chapter 2 and Peter warns Timothy about arguing. It was another reminder of how I should conduct myself even when upset.
I do have to admit when the bio mom was at my door it took a lot of strength to be kind to her.
I am continuing to pray for God's help in this area I do not believe this will be the last time I am tested in regards to 'loving' the bio mom.
Later tonight I am hoping to find time to post about our day in preschool.
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